Days 22 – 30: The Czech Republic!

After I’m sure what must be a week of intense anticipation…the blog is back! So much happened in the Czech Republic I figured it makes more sense to write about the whole trip in one sitting 🙂

Well. The fun began within about 4 minutes of arriving in the Czech Republic. We strolled through passport control to come across this absolute cretin:

Yep. Everyone, meet my brother. Naturally, I took one look at him and said “what the fricking hell are you doing you idiot”, thinking he would start laughing as well. But he didn’t. He shook my hand, welcomed me to the Czech Republic and insisted “play along, play along!!” Turns out our arrival caused quite a stir with other passengers thinking we really were Team GB athletes. Wonderful!

So after that we headed home and I remembered the two main reasons why I love the Czech Republic. Number one. My niece and nephews. They are still cheeky little children and lots of fun. Number two. Jitka’s cooking. My sister-in-law is without a doubt a 5-star michelin chef. I inhaled goulash and 3 apple strudels in one sitting. Running has its perks!

So, run number one in the Czech Republic was a brief 3.5 miles in the dark by the river. It was a nice and toasty -5 degrees. Lovely! It was pretty surreal running along the path and seeing rabbits the size of dogs in front of you. This is not an exaggeration – there is something seriously wrong with the rabbits in this country.

The next day we went for a longer run (about 4.5 miles) through this forest:

 

 

There were a lot of hills on this run, I felt a bit like Rocky running up the steps (don’t deny it, you all know the scene I’m talking about). It’s also a lot harder running off-road than I thought it would be.

 

Check out this action shot. Pretty damn professional.

So then we had the day off on the Friday and went to Jitka’s mums for her birthday. This was the evening before the race, and naturally, I wasn’t keen to drink. But anybody who has met Jitka’s mother knows this was wishful thinking. Three glasses of wine later, I was panicking about the hangover I might have the next day. But at least I didn’t slur my words, sit on a plant and headbutt the clock like my sister (that’s what a wine glass of Jelzin will do to you…)

The next day by some miracle I woke up feeling OK. IT WAS THE DAY OF THE RACE. I was nervous. We had a champion’s breakfast (sugary porridge), which my brother seemed to enjoy while pretending to be a female:

We listened to some pretty motivating songs on youtube (Rocky theme tunes, mostly) and then got ready. 

Now here’s the impressive part. IT WAS MINUS FOURTEEN DEGREES. I’m not sure there are actually any words to describe just how cold that is. We set off for Hulin to the stadium where the race was starting and filled out the forms. Hometown: ENGLAND. That got some funny looks.

Now so far, you might be reading this thinking, nothing embarrassing has really happened to Karen yet, how unusual. Think again. Turns out that using unisex toilets means you will in fact turn in the wrong direction to see a hairy Czech man weeing in the urinal, penis in hand.

We waited inside before the race because it really was unbearably cold (this is my “what the hell is this cold excruciating pain I’m feeling” face:

Holding my hands tight like that made no difference. It really, really hurt.

Everyone started to gather near the start line. There were 103 runners. I could feel the adrenaline rushing around my body. I was very nervous. All I could think was, don’t come last. Aim for that, and you’ll be fine.

All the runners there were insanely professional. They had all the running gear. I realised at this point the only people ridiculous enough to be running in minus 14 degree races were professional runners, and idiots. Me and my brother were those idiots.

We were inching towards the finish line waiting for the whistle to start. And we’re off! I realised within the first 10 seconds these runners were amazing. They had done one lap of the stadium and were off out into the town before I even registered what was happening! But I thought, who cares if they all beat me now, all I want to do is finish the race, and try and reach my target of around the hour mark.

I did the first lap of the stadium and turned into the town. As I went over the bridge, the wind was crazy. It made it even colder. The only way I can describe it is like I was being strangled (my neck was the only skin on show). The cold made my eyes water so vision impairment was an added bonus! Then when I was running along the main stretch the wind was trying to blow me sideways. It was so strong that it kept pushing the toggle out my hair. But I persevered!

So I’m running along the main stretch quite far behind. The runners reached the 5K mark and were now coming back in the opposite direction past me. This is apparently where I was running on the wrong side of the road. I’m guessing that’s why it was so intimidating having 50+ runners heading towards you! At first I felt pretty embarrassed I was still not halfway, but everybody else was clapping and cheering me on. This made me realise they weren’t going to laugh at how slow I was, but that it was great that I was making the effort and trying my best!

So I’m now at around the 8K mark and I’m struggling a little because of the cold. I think back to my brother’s advice of “get a power song ready on your IPOD for when you need help”. The song changes on my phone.

“In the navy! Yes you can sail the Seven Seas!” Hmm. Not quite the motivational song I required. 

I turned the corner and saw my brother heading towards me. He had finished the race, and as he promised my Mum, was coming back to see me to the end! I kept going and did my final lap of the stadium to cross the finish line.

And guess what.

I DIDN’T COME LAST. 101st PLACE!! 

I completed the run in 1 hour and 4 minutes and could not have been happier! My brother came 67th with a run of 46 minutes. The winner of the race completed in 33 minutes – he literally could have run it twice in the time it took me!!

A lot of people asked me if I got a medal after the race. I got something far more apt. An ice scraper.

We headed back home after putting on A LOT of layers where I got a Fidorka chocolate medal and home-made medals from Jitka and the kids. 

RUN COMPLETE. Now it was time to celebrate. We spent the rest of the day relaxing, drinking wine, Grandad’s vodka and making sure Jitka’s mum didn’t stop drinking. It was her birthday, and she bought some champagne back to share with all of us:

The next day we went on just a short run around the village. My brother was burping vodka, with a hint of vomit. We stopped to take some pictures of the view at the top of the hill:

And that was it. All of my Czech Republic running complete. If I think back to last year there is absolutely no way I would have been able to run a 10K race. It made me feel a lot more confident about the marathon, and made me realise I was ready to think about running for a charity.

After speaking to my Dad, co-runner and co-hobbit, we have decided to run for PLANETS CHARITY, organised by Southampton General Hospital. This charity raises money for pancreatic, liver and neuroendocrine tumours for research, family support and buying vital equipment. We chose this charity because it is currently affecting somebody very special to me. We all know that cancer affects so many people across the whole world and money is always needed to support the charities.

I hope that you have all enjoyed reading the blog so far and that you will sponsor me and my Dad for the marathon. It’s 26.2 miles of torture – come on, you know you would pay to see that!! The sponsorship link will follow shortly! 

Charity website: http://www.planetscharity.org/

 

 

Day 21.

Miles: 4.59

Time: 50 Mins.

I love being back in Hedge End! Apparently everyone who lives in Surrey woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. I’ve never seen so many grumpy people in my life. And then, I arrived in Hedge End. The sun was shining. People are happy! When yo jog past another runner they smile back. When you need to cross the road, cars stopped and wave you across. Sounds small, but it really does make a difference!

Today’s run was quite short and tomorrow’s day off will be spent travelling to Czech Republic!! Very excited. I will try to keep you updated on what I’m sure will be the funniest blogs to date over there 🙂

The sibling reunion starts here! And Mum STILL hasn’t given us that warning she usually does. I wonder if she has forgotten…. 🙂

 

Day 19.

Miles: 7.44

Time: 1 Hour 29 Mins + 5 Min Detour Wee Stop

 

Unbelievable – I ran 7.44 miles! Did not think that was possible. Very pleased with myself and sitting in the sofa feeling pretty damn smug 🙂

I ran in my new trainers today after a trip to the SweatShop. They are pretty bright, but so much more comfortable to run in! But something very strange is happening to me that I’m more excited about a new pair of trainers than a pair of shiny boots. Never mind, I can rectify that in a few hours in London this afternoon!

Feeling so happy!

Day 17. The Torrential Hailstorm.

Miles: 3.7

Time: 42 mins.

Today’s run was painful. And wet.

I set off when it was spitting slightly, which I’ve ran in before. It’s actually not too bad. I have found recently that I can run without really getting a stitch anymore. The rain got a little heavier on the first loop around the pub (which was cooking burgers that smelled amazing as always) but it wasn’t too noticeable.

Until I got to the university again. Then the heavens opened. It was the kind of rain that instantly soaks you right through to your underwear. Huge drops of rain that you can visibly see smashing on the concrete. I’m not exaggerating, it really was raining that hard.

I counted no less than 7 cars driving through puddles and splashing me. So that was fantastic.

Just when I thought it couldn’t actually get any worse, it started raining hailstones. Huge ones. They smacked me in the face, head, chest, feet. Everywhere. (To the point I just got home and have some pretty red sore skin…). Turns out, you look pretty mental running down the road with your arms protecting your head shouting “ow f*ck, ooh, ow bollocks” quite loudly.

But I still carried on, even though I could have given up. Because I am a running rockstar.

P.S. If you are a student, and you are walking on the pavement with an umbrella and huge coat, and you see me running towards you, politely move out of my way. Or I will slap you with my soaking wet gloves. 

Day 16.

Miles: 2.1

Time: 23 mins

I can only apologise for the disappointment today, but to be honest, I’ve got nothing exciting to say about the run. Let’s hope tomorrow a leprechaun jumps out in front of me with a shiny pot of gold.

Day 15.

Miles: 5.8

Time: 1 Hour 12 Mins

So today I accidentally ran 5.8 miles. 

It had been a pretty interesting day, and by interesting, I mean I cannot believe that my boss can irritate me while on the other side of the world. 

I needed to combine running with a trip to Tesco tonight (turns out you can’t just eat cheese for 3 days in a row) so I drove down to Egham. On the way, a massive tosser decided to pull onto the roundabout in front of me, to which I swore out the window. The similarities between me and my Dad are endless.

So anyway, feeling slightly mardy from today’s events, I decided to loop around Egham bypass twice. TWICE. This meant I would run the 4 miles as planned. Except then I doubted how many times I was supposed to run around it, ran around it again, and therefore boosted up to 5.8 miles.

Sounds impressive, no? Here’s what happens when you run for longer than intended. The first time you run past Burger King you think, mmmm, those chips smell quite good. What do I fancy for dinner tonight? On the second loop, I see the fat man outside Burger King and want to punch him in the face in a fit of hunger-induced jealousy. By the third loop, I probably would have eaten that fat man, and quite enjoyed it.

So I’m starving. My dinner is still cooking in the oven at a snail’s pace. But, it does have spinach in it. Because it makes you stronger. Popeye told me. (Laura, take note, it’s a VEGETABLE).

Oh and also, I saw a man DRIVING while using his phone. Yep. He got the glare. It was so good he put his phone down and I saw the guilt in his eyes. SUCCESS.

Day 13.

Miles: 5.35

Time: 1 Hour 3 Mins

 

Yesterday was the first time I went for a run during the day time! It’s so much nicer actually being able to see where you are going! 

I ran quite slowly, but was pretty pleased with myself I didn’t stop – 5.35 miles is the furthest I’ve ever ran. And I found 20p on the floor in Blays Lane.

But most importantly, going on a 5 mile run means that you can eat an extremely high level of cheese afterwards 🙂 

Day 12.

Miles: 3.7

Time: 39.5 mins

This evening we decided to go to the pub after work (no surprises there). However, this makes it very difficult to leave early because you have to run. It makes it even harder when you have to loop back past the pub three times….

I’ve realised that I also like to daydream when I run – usually I am thinking about complete nonsense. Today I was hit with some pretty devastating news that John the vet is gay – all the good looking ones are. I’m not surprised.

I’m a bit nervous about tomorrow’s longer run in the morning. But, I will think about the 40 different types of cheese now residing in my fridge (slight exaggeration). 

P.S. This marathon training is pretty tough. Would anybody like to do my washing up?

Day 10.

Miles: 2.85

Time: 30 mins

I don’t really have much to say about today’s run. Except I’ve done it before, but today I ran it faster!

What I do have something to say about, is my brother. Today he decided to enter me into a 10K race on the 25th January in the Czech Republic. Because he is an idiot. But I’m sure the majority of you will find it most hilarious. Hopefully after my next longer run on Saturday I will feel better about it. Presently, I’m pretty sure I will come last. At least I can say I might come first in the “English Racers” category 🙂

Day 9.

Miles: 3.7

Time: 42 mins

I really didn’t feel like going for a run tonight so I really had to force myself into my trainers. I knew this might happen as soon as I’m back at work, but at least the runs are good at helping clearing your head of drama.

I wanted to avoid Tite Hill and the creepy back roads tonight so I did a three-time loop around the university and my house. Except this meant running past my favourite pub and fish and chip shop three times – torture. My reaction to the smell of chips made me realise I’m more like my Dad than I thought.

It was especially nice to run for the first time today and not have house-related stress in my head. Now the proverbial weight has been lifted off my shoulders, time to get it lifted off the rest of my body!! If this marathon doesn’t make me a skinny goddess then what exactly is the point….

And to those of you who say “eat less, move more” – you can sod off. I’ll run, but if you dare to take the cake away from me I will in fact cut off your hand.